It's Tyler, informing Leslie that Kalyn went to the hospital in an ambulance. At the hospital, Leslie learns that borrowing a daughter to be on a reality TV show doesn't means beans to the hospital staff. Leslie and Tyler are kept in the dark about Kalyn 's condition because they're not blood relatives. Later, Kalyn gives us the rundown — she was rushed to the hospital for bad back pain, she got IVs and morphine, the doctors talked to her about surgery, it was traumatic.
What seems like an hour later, she leaves the hospital to go home. That has to be weird for Melissa, since she's the one who started trouble imagine that between Cindy and DeAynni at the Texas Diva party.
On her couch, Cindy's jaw hammers out, "I was furious when Melissa said Dee was going around saying I was basically an absentee mom. Dee hits her kids! I'd move. DeAynni, thinking she's so cute and funny, adds, "I'm hands on ; you're hands off. Melissa tells Cindy and DeAynni about her new business venture. Cindy is like, Wow, Vera Wang?!? Melissa is like, she's a fake. DeAynni tells Melissa to seek out investors.
With a bounce in step pain in her voice, Cindy offers to help. Melissa takes off, and DeAynni asks Cindy if she's really going to invest in Melissa's line.
Cindy laughs, "Umm, probably not. Cindy's like, Please, what does Melissa know about swimwear? Let's drink to that everything. Apparently, Maddie is the face of Bonnie 's Fiona Frost character. Bonnie and Maddie and by extension, Melissa go to a local radio show to talk about the book. While they're waiting to go on the air, Bonnie tells Melissa about the picture of Booger's butt tattoo, which she refers to as porn.
Bonnie exaggerates. Leslie approaches Kalyn , whispering, "You look better. Do you feel better? On the couch, Leslie says, "I was completely freaked out that Kalyn went to the hospital… I've been so hard on her.
Maybe she means when didn't indulge her with overpriced clothes or when she demanded to talk about Kalyn's firing when Kalyn wanted to talk about it? Leslie needs Kalyn to tell her what ails her. Kalyn tells Leslie that she developed a severe kidney infection because Whitney harassed her.
Leslie eats it up. On the couch, Kalyn further explains her dire situation, "When I went into the hospital, the doctor informed me that kidney infections are sometimes caused by stress … I know why I was stressed … It was because of all of the stuff between me and Whitney , and how she's been picking on me a lot lately. Kalyn tells Leslie she tried to be mature… by asking Booger to pierce her vagina?
Still, Leslie assures Kalyn this is "not over. Or, as Bonnie puts it, to take her investigation to the next level. Bonnie gives Booger a sandwich, and then jumps right in with weird questions. Q: How old were you when you got "peek a boo" above your ass? A: About I'm kind of a goofy and silly guy. I met Bonnie at the country club…. Investing in Woodhaven Country Club. Ifelicious: I know season 1 ended with you saying that you wanted to be an investor in the country club, and then things changed, and it looks like you backed out.
What happened with that? Leslie: With the country club, and this is completely true, I have yet to receive any paperwork. I had a meeting with Mr. Oh my gosh! Ifelicious: The cocktail party conversation amongst the girls seem to be for the purpose of getting you to admit that. At the cocktail party, the gals are all together with Mr. Is that fully up and operational at this point? Ifelicious: How can people learn about your services?
Is it online? Do you have a website? Actually, I have another son. In the pageant industry, people are familiar with me. Ifelicious: How is your new pageant business doing so far? That is not my intention. I want it to be like where I can just travel and go and do seminars or even host an event and do things like that. Ifelicious: Is there something else you do on a full time basis? Leslie: I manage my properties. Opening a Pilates Studio.
Ifelicious: In episode 1 of season 2, at the fall cocktail party, you mention opening a Pilates studio. Is that out of the picture now? I thought I would do it in Dallas, but it just makes more sense because this attorney friend lives in California, too. Property Management and Ownership. Also, Whitney supports this suspicion during her break up with Tyler, telling her mother, Bonnie, basically the same thing.
Leslie: [Tyler] did bring [Whitney] to our family home [in Washington], and it really is on the market. Other people have really good jobs.
They probably make a lot more money than do. Her name is Leslie Birkland…of no relation to my family. Leslie: She is a professor. Ifelicious: OK, so to set the records straight, tell me what you do actually own. Leslie: It sure seems to be! Leslie continues to ponder the issue, "Everyone's thinking that just because Kalyn has a kidney infection it's because she's being the slut of the town. I want to help her focus on having a moral compass.
Somehow, I think Kalyn would appreciate and get more use out of Cindy's offering more than Leslie's. On her couch, Cindy says, "I don't know if a life coach is going to keep Kalyn from sleeping around.
Here's some advice… keep your legs closed. Whitney visits Bonnie , bearing gifts a basket full of dirty laundry and demanding food. Bonnie throws a bag of potato chips Whitney's way and asks to meet Booger 's parents. Bonnie is a little scared to learn that Booger's dad rides motorcycles. Bonnie shares, "Ever since I met Jason nineteen years ago, he's always wanted a Harley.
I always said no. He should just get one. Whitney is like, well, nice knowing you, cause I'm getting one too. Bonnie says, "Over my dead body. Back at Casa Slut, Leslie storms into Kalyn 's room to judge her bras and talk about her moral compass. Kalyn asks, "What do you mean — moral compass?
I know that you're not a slut but that is the rumor that is around. If you can just dedicate yourself to actually be moral. Leslie thinks that just maybe she hasn't been the best Godmother, and, by golly, she wants to be the very best Godmother on TV. Leslie decides to have Kalyn baptized.
Alone on her couch, Kalyn says, "Is Leslie crazy? This is my punishment… being drowned in a pool. This is insane. Booger thinks Bonnie and Jason meeting his parents is a lovely idea. Whitney is like, really?
Whitney fears her mom will show up in a costume. Booger accepts Whitney's hand and raises her a dad who wears socks with sandals. Meanwhile, Cindy and Melissa meet with a personal trainer. Cindy wants to "really try him out" if you know she means.
Cindy and Melissa work out a little and sexually harass the trainer a lot. Bonnie and Leslie meet for drinks. Right away, Bonnie tells Leslie, "I'm not really sure why I'm here. Leslie argues, "Kalyn is eighteen.
Make excuses all you want. She's an adult. When Leslie says Bonnie jumped into Whitney and Kalyn's fight, Bonnie insists that Leslie is the one that brought her into it. Bonnie and Leslie just argue back and forth. Rumors and accusations fly… Who did this? Who has their vagina pierced? Who started what? Finally, Leslie says arguing is useless because she will always defend Kalyn and Bonnie will always defend Whitney.
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